Friendship

"Sometimes you put up walls not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down."

I am so blessed that I have so many people that I call my "friends". I feel as if I have all types of friends...or at least that I have enough =) I wish there was a way to make them realize how much they mean to me because they really have affected my life. Here are a bunch of quotes that just define friendship and are nice to read!

"To the world you may be just one person, to to one person you may be the world."

"Even though we've changed and we're all finding out own place in the world, we all know that when the tears fall or the smile spreads across our face, we'll come to each other because no matter where this crazy world takes us, nothing will ever change so much to the point where we're not all still friends."

"This is my wish for you: Comfort on difficult days, smile when sadness intrudes, rainbows to follow the clouds, laughter to kiss your lips, sunsets to warm your heart, hugs when spirits sag, beauty for your eyes to see, friendships to brighten your being, faith so that you can believe, confidence for you when you doubt, courage to know yourself, patience to accept the truth, love to complete your life."

"A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are."

"Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget."

"A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked." 

"Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Just walk beside me and be my friend." 

So enough of that. Friends are those who are willing to listen to your crap all night and not mention how tired they are. Friends are those are who can encourage you when others don't believe in you. Friends are those who love you even if you really are crazy. Friends are those who will walk in mad sketchy areas if you need a friend with you. Friends are those who are willing to listen to Spanish music just because you have this new love for it. Friends are those who will pick up when your parents call. Friends are those who will tell you that the guy/girl that dumped you is ugly and a jerk. Friends are those who will stand by you always.

But they aren't all like that. Some are just friends while you're in a certain class with them, and that's fine. Some are just friends when you see them at camp, but that's fine as well. Some are just there when you're living in a certain area, that's totally cool. You can't have everyone in your life at all times. It's just not possible. And although friends do all of the above, you can't EXPECT them to because expectations can and will ruin everything. But it's not easy to have a friend and not expect them to "be there for you" right? So what are we supposed to do?  

Anyway, I just wanna let some people know that I loveeee them! The people I keep in touch with from high school-you are awesome. From a class of 632, there's a reason why I only talk to you now; you all have a special place in my life, and I'm glad that we'll always keep in touch. My dance girls-so much to say about you all, but for now let me just point out that I haven't seen you in 11 months, how insane! Anyway, I love our random days in the basement catching up and crying and laughing! My Swadhyay friends-you guys are just plain awesome. I love that we can talk about anything and everything because our relationship is so pure in a sense, and we are all connected through the most amazing person ever, to say the least. My RU friends-damn I never thought I'd be so happy in New Jersey, but I love it. You guys make every day an adventure-climbing roofs, eating at random places, studying in buildings we shouldn't be in, [not] going to classes together, etc. Thanks so much for making my college experience as amazing as it is. My family-what can I possibly say about you guys?! I love you. For those of you that don't fit into these categories-there's gotta be a reason why I hang out with you or talk to you, haha. 

Anyway, each and every one of you makes every day special, and I wanted to thank you for that. Appreciate your friends and life will be better! Spend more time with them, because as said before, time is precious.

So long. <3 

Bride & Prejudice

"Will Darcy: There's nothing wrong with having standards, is there?
Lalita Bakshi: No, as long as you don't force them on others" 

So a lot of people absolutely LOVE this movie, and others think that it's ridiculous. I'm kind of in the middle of both of those thoughts-I think that this movie has a lot of potential, but it wasn't put together right. ("It" meaning the story, not the acting.) First of all, the struggle people still face about marrying outside of their religion, culture, samaj, etc. is not as easy as they made it seem. Granted, it may be that simple for some people and that's fantastic for them, really is. But what about the others that are still struggling so incredibly much? I'm not sure about everyone else, but I definitely was waiting for that struggle towards the end but it just didn't really happen. 

So now about interracial marriages: they're becoming so much more common but so many Indians are still not accepting them. My Aunt was told not to "disgrace the family" at her engagement with my Mama-I mean, seriously? How ridiculously RUDE is that? And more than that, so many parents say that they accept and don't mind interracial marriages, but once it has to do with their own kids, they're like "no no...no way". Whyyy? 

I think it's really cool if you talk about things beforehand. I mean, think about it-your kids are going to have two different cultures. That's so awesome! As long as you stay true to yourself, I think things could turn out really well. I understand that if you do have to struggle to have others agree and to get their blessings, then it makes it so much tougher and it's really sad at points because it gets frustrating. But I think that that essentially strengthens your love. I know an absolutely perfect couple and after everything they've been through, they're so happy right now. More than that, their families are really happy too. I think families play a major role in your lives because 1. they know you so well 2. they want you to be happy 3. they will always be a part of your lives. So why wouldn't you care about what they think or say? I mean, yes of course your own feelings play a major role-you're the one living with the person, but don't forget about your family. Don't be so blinded by love is what I might be trying to say.

This is kind of just a random post, but I am sure that most of you have thought about the future or you've heard of stories of people. It's just an interesting topic. Your thoughts? Any good stories? 

So long <3 

One Hour to Live

"Time is free, but it's priceless. You can't own it, but you can use it. You can't keep it, but you can spend it. Once you've lost it, you can never get it back."

This blog REALLY requires feedback from you guys when you have time! You don't need to register or anything to comment, you just sign in with you gmail account if you have one. 

Okay so that quote pretty much defines what "time is" through a riddle. We all know that it's easy to 'waste' time, though the definition of 'wasting time' is on an individual basis. We all know that we procrastinate often; it's just easy to do. And we know that we can't get that time back, right? We agree on that?

So here's the scenario-you have ONE hour to live. You could be anywhere, with anyone, doing whatever you want. No Jigar, you wouldn't have to worry about the bus system at Rutgers =p. Seriously though, ANYWHERE doing ANYTHING. What would you do for those 60 minutes? 

I don't think that I could really formulate what I want to do unless that a situation like this really does happen to me. So if someone told me this on the spot, this is what I'd probably say: I want to be with my family & friends and do something good. I would want to volunteer somewhere and help people out. At the same time, I would want to be able to talk to the people I'm with and have some damn good conversations. I love talking...love it. I feel like I would also text people and remind them that they at one point or another impacted my life and I'm truly grateful for everything they've done. I think during my last moments, I would remind Nick to stay the good person he is, because he has so much potential. I would also tell him that I'm watching over him, no matter what other people tell him-because I do believe that people can watch over us if they want to. God's not cruel :)

I guess that's it for me, pretty simple. This topic MAY seem depressing BUT it doesn't have to be! Some of you may want to go skydiving, rock climbing, etc. You may want to be the president for your last hour, who knows?! There are SOOOOO many things you might want to do during your last hour! 

Share with us :)

So long. <3

[Surprise.]

"Sure God created man before woman, but then again you always make a rough draft before creating the final masterpiece."

Hah, just felt like using that quote because it's funny. Anyway, I sat it on two of my friends' psychology class last semester & listened to the awesome professor's lecture. She started off with a good story that got to all of us. It made us laugh, but more than that, it made us question ourselves. So here's the story as I remember it:

Professor: A father and son are in a car on their way home. Because they get into a great conversation, the father stops paying attention for a second and they get into an awful accident. The father died immediately. The son was rushed into the hospital. As soon as he was taken into the ICU, the surgeon looked down and gasped, "I can't operate on him. This is my son." 

Professor: How is this possible? [For awhile, no one said anything. So she urged us on.]

Students: Stepfather? The father didn't really die? Grandfather? [Yes, we came up with ridiculous answers.]

Professor: The surgeon was his mother. 

If you thought of it being his mother right away, then good for you. Maybe it's because this is through text. Or maybe you're just smarter than the whole lecture hall...not sure which it is. Either way, we then talked about gender. How come even in 20[10] we don't immediately think that a surgeon could be a female? How come we are still so shocked when a nurse is a male or a secretary is a male? Or there is a female on a football team? Or a wrestling team? It doesn't make sense.

Here we are fighting for our rights and equality, but then we are shocked when certain things happen. We have all this energy fighting for equality in the workforce, and we do a good job of it as well but once we get it, we kind of give it up. How come our parents still tell us (females): "it's not YOU that we don't trust, it's them [men]." Or they don't let us go places just because we're girls and it's late? WHY?

Anyway, I just wanted to put that story out there cause I found it in my notes while cleaning my car! By the way, the original title of this post was going to be "gender" but that would totally give it away.

So long. <3

The Education System

"Education … has produced a vast population able to read but unable to distinguish what is worth reading."

So for the past few days, I've been talking to my cousins about the education system. And gosh is it frustrating! Before saying anything, let me state that I am so grateful for the education I am receiving. I am so grateful to my parents for letting me go anywhere that I want to. I am grateful that Sachem East taught me to take all opportunities. I am grateful that RU has so many options for me so that I can create my own future. I really am. I do feel awful for those that aren't able to be educated. I'm not lying!

But...there's so much more to it. WHY do we have to take certain classes that will never ever help us? For example, think back to high school. WHY did you learn about proofs when you will never have to prove things like that? WHY did you learn about WW2 fifteen different times when you're really never going to think about that ever again? WHY did you have to learn about integrals when it really isn't going to help you on a daily basis (unless your career depends on it)? I get that not everyone knows what they'll do in the future so it's important to know, but really-there has GOT to be a better system. 

Now jump to college. If you are a business major, WHY do you need to take science classes? If you are a science major, WHY do you have to take religion classes? If you are a religion major, WHY do you have to take any classes that aren't related to religion? Yes, their reason is logical-they want you to be "diverse" but didn't you do that in high school? And yes they want to make sure you're semi-okay if you change your major. But seriously, that's your fault and you should just have to take an extra year or two because that isn't fair to the rest of us.

Here's the worst thing. I am a business econ major and I absolutely HATE my econ classes. My cousin is going to be an engineer and he HATES his physics classes. I know that I don't need econ courses to do amazing in life. I can work for any company and do well because I have the potential. I can learn and grow and develop and shine. Am I being conceited? Maybe...but I don't mean to be. I'm sure a lot of you feel that you would be great working in your field even if your grades don't show it. My cousin is a teacher and she knows that she's one of [few] that really deserves to be educating our future generation but how can she make that known? Sometimes, we don't get positions because we're too good for them-but is that fair?! And sometimes, we don't seem to be doing enough but we have intense passion for what we want to do so we don't get the job-is that fair?

People that are so involved with the education system beyond just learning think that it needs to be changed. So why isn't anyone doing anything about it?! HOW can we fix it? It's been this way for so long. OH and random fact--remember those weekly vocab quizzes? How many words do you remember? Hmm, none? Why not? Because you memorized them a few minutes before your quiz right? That needs to change! If Sachem officially puts together a curriculum council, I am so going to be a part of it because the Superintendent thinks that I'd be perfect for it. Let's see what I can change!

UGHHHH Hina, please customize an "anger" stamp for me so I can write letters to anyone and everyone, signing it as "officially angry" or whatever you said. I'm ready! 

So long <3

Tejalben.

"I dropped a tear in the ocean. When they find it, I'll stop missing you."

I learned in the past few months...
That your favorite flower is my favorite flower.
That the most unique flower you've seen is growing in my living room right now.
That you absolutely love your cousins & nieces & nephews.
That you love dressing up.
That you and your brother are so close.
That you get along so well with so many people.
That you love India.
That you plan for things way in the future [that picture you want to show Mahi at her wedding].
That you have two dream homes (at least).
That you love taking care of babies and puppies.
That you love taking pictures.
That you were born in our home in Dingucha.
That everyone really loved their two bhaanis, and were excited for their maamerus.
That our family in India absolutely adored you.
That you also sucked at flying kites, hah.
That you love sugar cane juice.
That you were probably just having a bad week or month or year when you visited.
That you took some official "modeling" pictures.
That you were in a music video.
That you love chocolate.
That you like oranges.
That you believed in God...and maybe even heaven.
That you love sunsets.
That you liked roller coasters.
That you said you wanted to read Songs of Blood & Sword a few days before leaving...
That your boss liked you.
That your chocolate pecan pies were good-or so they looked.

I can't stop going through your pictures to learn more about you. I know that it's not good but there is no way for me to feel closer to you. I miss you. I'm not sure if I'm come to terms with your death yet; hence the fact that some verbs are still in the present tense. I wish that I had taken out time to learn about all of the above earlier...and that we didn't worry so much about the little issues we had. [But what's gone is gone.]

Sigh, I don't even really know what to say. There is a little bit of hope in me that says you can read this, wherever you are. But the logical me knows that that isn't true.

But there is something that is true. At this bhaani's wedding, you will be remembered. The maameru I receive will be for both of us, because that's how it was meant to be. I miss you and I hope that God is taking care of you.

I just had to get that off my mind. I love you <3 <3 <3 Oh, and I intend to read that book before Nov 2nd 2011.

So long <3

Procrastination is a...

"There are a million ways to lose a work day, but not even a single way to get one back."

WHY do we all procrastinate when we know early enough when things are to be done by?! WHY?! Yeah yeah...everyone says that they work best under pressure (at the last minute), but really? Isn't that just an excuse? 

Just imagine how amazing your [paper, Power Point, etc.] would be if you spent a few hours every week on it. Your research would be more thorough. Your presentation would be memorized. Everything would be in order. You would be calm the last few hours...right? 


I have some random stories I can remember at the moment that I'd like to share--

Summer before 11th grade, I had a lot of homework. All summer, I decided that I'd spend the last week of vacation doing it because that would be plenty of time. The night before "my week" officially started, Mom & Dad call Nick & I upstairs and tell us to pack because we are going to Canada, Ohio, Maryland & New Jersey and we won't be back until the night before school starts. ...you've GOT to be kidding me. So now, I was with my cousins READING and doing homework when I could be having a blast because I really had no choice. It REALLY sucked.


So I should have learned from that, right? Uhh...not really. Senior year, I remember being up until 5:30 (yes, that's when I woke up for school) writing a paper for something. Although I can't remember what it was for, I know for a fact that I could and should have done it earlier-but I didn't. What's great is that I remember most of my friends being up that night with me...sigh. 


So then did I learn? Again, no. Last semester, I remember being at the suites til God knows what time trying to get help for my Wiley homework. Let me tell you that I was given those problems in September, and it was December at this time. WHY did I wait so long? I still don't know.


And have I learned yet? Eh, maybe. This semester I've been trying to get things done early but does that mean that I always do so? Nope. I'm still in the process of changing myself because procrastination really does become a habit. And you know what? For those of you that actually do well at the last minute, that's good for you. I am one of those people, so I know it feels great realizing that procrastination isn't that bad. But seriously...I still think it's a bad habit. Twenty years from now, you're going to be a parent, a spouse, a doctor/business person/lawyer--you are going to have so many responsibilities. How will you wait til the last minute to cook? To drive your child to their event? To do the laundry? To contact your patient/client? 


You know what's going to happen then? If you are still a procrastinator, you are going to end up doing all of the above last minute and because of it, you will be the friend that cancels all coffee dates and parties because you won't be able to keep up with it. Slowly, you'll realize how you haven't been able to keep in touch with your friends, and it's really going to hurt. Am I being too pessimistic? Maybe. But it's the truth.


And...do you think that you'll automatically stop procrastinating once you're older? Didn't you think that about college when you were in high school? And high school when you were in middle school? And middle school when you learned about the word in elementary school? ...so has it "naturally" come to you yet? I doubt it-I'm sure you still procrastinate. So how about now we take a stance to try procrastinating less. How? Pick ONE class and make sure you never procrastinate in this class. See how it goes! Let me know!


[If you don't procrastinate already, that is sooooo awesome! Let me know HOW!]


Oh. I am totally procrastinating right now by writing this and not doing my research, but I'm about to do it now. Good luck!


So long <3

"Better Late Than Never"...or is it?

"What's meant to be will always find a way."

 So I've been wanting to write for a few days now, especially since I'm home and whatnot. But nothing seemed inspiring enough & I would find it frustrating looking at the blog. But today something changed. And guess what the inspiration was? Yes, that's right-How I Met Your Mother! 


If you don't watch HIMYM, then you should start watching it. It really is as awesome as all your friends say it is...anyway, so in the episode that inspired me, this is what happened: Robin interviewed someone who believed that she could calculate peoples' compatibility and then convinced Ted to go see her. Reluctantly, he went there and was shocked to hear that there were only 8 people perfect for him in NYC. Five days later, he comes back to this lady to find out that there is actually no one perfect for him...except someone that already has a boyfriend. Let me emphasize this: Ted's compatibility with this girl was 9.6, where as her compatibility with her current boyfriend was 8.5. Ted was upset that the one person that was almost perfect for him (9.6) was already with someone else...and he couldn't do anything about it because he later learned that she was getting married that same weekend. (And yes, she actually did seem perfect for him.) 

But that got me thinking about a few things that everyone worries about at least once in their lives: how do you know when you've found the right person? Will some calculations be able to tell you that? What if you find the person too late? What if you have someone and then you find someone better? There are so many more questions, but I guess after talking to my friends and cousins, I've put together my own answers. These are "temporary" answers because I won't REALLY be able to tell you until after I have found 'my right guy'.

I personally don't think that calculations can tell two people that they are perfect for each other. I understand that answering questions can tell people who they may get along with...but what about couples that are completely the opposite yet they get along so well? I think that even if peoples' perfect ideas of dates aren't the same, they can still appreciate each others' ideas. Even if people have different values, I think that they can blend together to form a new set of values that can be the basis for their new family. I truly do believe that opposites can attract, but that doesn't mean that similar people won't get along. I guess what I'm trying to say is that give anyone and everyone a chance because you never know when someone is right for you. And just because it doesn't seem right the first time, that doesn't mean that it won't be right the second time. So give it another chance. [Not gonna lie, this is very difficult to explain through writing.]

Anyway. I think that once you find the right person, that's it. There is no one else out there for you, as long as once in your life you are completely sure that this is the person, then that's it. Think about it this way-let's say that you are with someone for 15 years and you absolutely love someone. And then one day, you start getting along with someone else. Do you really think that you love this person more than you've loved the other person for 15 years? Or do you think that maybe you just need something exciting in your current relationship? I really do think that someone new might just make you feel great and amazing and young and pretty/handsome for awhile, but try adding something new into your current relationship and see where that takes you!

I know that most of my friends aren't even married yet, so this might be a weird post to read but I'm sure most of you have already thought about this or talked about it with someone. I think that it's something interesting to think about--but don't over-think anything when it comes to relationships because "it's all from the heart". Does that make sense?

Hmm I think that's it for now. Thoughts? Any stories?

Oh, random thing before I'm done-sometimes, if you know that someone is really right for you, then fight it. Make sure you make things work out for you two because you will be so happy after wards. Don't let anything or anyone get in the way. 

Totally just lost my train of thought, way too many people are at home right now. Yay Spring break!

So long. <3

What's Wrong with Me?

" No one is perfect... that's why pencils have erasers."


So many people just assume that they are perfect and will continue to be perfect forever. They think that cancer won't get to them, they'll be healthy forever, they'll never have family issues, their future will be perfect, etc. 


...not to be the bearer of bad news, but WAKE UP & SMELL THE COFFEE. 


Life isn't perfect. And I just want to make sure that all of you - my friends - are ready to face any difficulties and obstacles that come your way. I don't ever want you to be in one of the situations written above, questioning yourself and asking: "what's wrong with me?" Because in all honesty, there's nothing wrong with you. Whoever you are, however you are...you're just right. Your silliness, your problems, your questions-it's all normal.


Embrace who you are. Accept yourself, and you'll see the wonders that happen after that -everyone will love you! 


But, back to what I was saying. Be ready for things because they'll be a lot easier to deal with when they happen. I'm not saying to live with a negative attitude, but definitely be ready. If (let's pray not) something does happen, then you don't want to be so freaked out that you can't even deal with it. 


I am having issues focusing right now, but I hope that this got the message across. If not, let me repeat: THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU. =) I guess that's all I'm trying to say. Accept yourself if you want others to accept you; it's a pretty simple concept.

So long. <3 

True Joy

"This is the true joy in life, the being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; the being thoroughly worn out before you are thrown on the scrap heap; the being a force of Nature instead of a feverish selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy"

My professor presented this quote in class today, and gave us an unofficial homework that I would like to open up to all of you! He said, look at the first seven words of this quote and write them down on a piece of paper.

"This is the true joy in life..."

He then went on to say: "over Spring break, take out a few minutes to finish that phrase & personalize it for yourself. What is the true joy in YOUR life?" And I had a light-bulb moment. I wanted to share my "true joy" with all of you. More than that, I wanted to hear about your "true joy" in life.

So here goes nothing:

This is the true joy in life...I have a family that loves me unconditionally and supports me no matter what. More than that, they help me figure myself out, and I absolutely love them for it. I'm lucky enough to have a brother that is more than a brother; he is my best friend. I have friends that care about me, and are more than friends. I am at an out-of-state school, yet I never feel alone because I have my parivar here; I have brothers and sisters that are there for me every step of the way. My joy in life is that I have so many opportunities-the opportunity to be educated, the opportunity to get a job, to have a career, to build my future, to volunteer in another country, to help others. My joy is to be able to receive medical help when needed, to be able to drink clean water, to be able to shower, to be able to eat when I'm hungry, to be able to print when I need to. My joy is not necessarily technology, hah. My joy is my life...it's learning to accept everything, to love everyone. Without Dadaji, I wouldn't really understand all of the above, because I have learned to be grateful because of him. My ultimate joy is because of him, it is him. It is the life he led, the life I can lead with his guidance.

That is my true joy.

What's yours?

So long. <3

Quick Follow-Up on "People Piss Me Off"

"Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it. Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it. Hatred darkens life; love illumines it."

This is a really quick follow-up! The last post is a GREAT way for all of us to vent! But here's quick reminder: venting won't change anything. We can't change anyone...we can only change ourselves. So look at it this way: take a look at the list again and see what pisses you off. And then figure out why it pisses you off. And then, finally, try to figure out how you can see it all in a positive light. Let's look at some examples.

1. Drivers...Positive aspect: Let's say someone just cut you off and you got really angry. Stop and think about it this way: what if this is the FIRST time they've ever made a mistake? It's forgivable, right? Also, are you a perfect driver? No, I guess we all make mistakes! Just take a second to think about it.

4. People who don't study...Positive aspect: some people are just really good at certain things. Instead of being jealous and annoyed at them, it's better to think about your own positive skills and develop them. That way, there's a combination of a lot great people with awesome skills.

10. Teachers...maybe they're having a bad day. Or a bad year. You don't know about their personal lives. What if they lost someone they were once so close to? It takes awhile to get over such things. And if you think about it this way, everyone that's a teacher is a teacher because they care to educate others and help them out. So just give them another chance and try to see it from their points-of-view!

15. Speaking up...it's not in everyone's personality to speak up. That doesn't mean they don't care. I guess the best you can do it speak up yourself, and also give others a chance to speak. Maybe they don't like big crowds-talk to them individually. Take out time to care for everyone else because just because they don't speak up doesn't mean they don't care. Help them, and in that way, you'll be developing as well!

I saw some of the comments, and one that got to me was about two-way streets. Yeah, relationships are always two way streets, but there are times in life when something is a "one-way" street which is okay as long as you are doing the right thing. No matter what happens, keep doing what's right and you will develop yourself no matter what. It's not always about YOU, but it is always about you becoming a better person!

I just didn't want you all to think I'm a hater...I'm actually venting so that I can figure out where I have issues with others and slowly I can develop and become a better person.

So long. <3

"People Piss Me Off"

"I have decided to stick with love.  Hate is too great a burden to bear."  


Martin Luther King, Jr. was obviously an amazing character. And if you think about it, that quote is pretty awesome. A view like that would probably make us all happier people. But realistically speaking, how many of us actually have that outlook in life? 


I know that my best friend doesn't...this post is actually for her. She's been asking me to write about how people piss her off for the past few days so I thought: why not make her happy? 


So I'll share our thoughts here, but then you guys can input why/how/when people piss you off. I guess it'll give us a platform to discuss what annoys us. More than that, it'll give us a chance to introspect and see if sometimes it's our fault as well. Maybe we also have to improve and change ourselves, because after all, no one is perfect! 

1. Drivers. There are so many people driving that DON'T know how to drive. Seriously, turn on your signals. And then, when you're done turning, turn it off. It's actually quite simple. And don't turn if you see me driving fast...do you really want to die? And seriously, if you're old...stop driving. If you can't see the road, stop driving. It's no excuse. I personally think that everyone should have to retake their road test after a certain number of years because your eyesight has changed, you're grumpy all the time, etc. 
2. Roommates/housemates/apartment-mates/suitemates. If you delegate tasks from the beginning, I don't understand why people can't just do what they're supposed to. It's usually written on paper. Just re-read it. Make sure you're doing what you have to do. Don't let your friendship with others get ruined because you aren't capable of vacuuming on time, cleaning the bathroom properly, sweeping, etc. It's not a good reason to lose friends...
3. People in organizations. Same thing, if you're given a task to accomplish, then do it. Prioritize properly. If you're a part of a team, then show that you really care and you're a good asset to the group. Prove yourself. 
4. People who don't study & do well. It's just not fair, especially when you're the one trying so hard and not doing well.
5. People who think they're amazing. And they're not. It's as simple as that. 
6. People who lie on their resume. It's illegal, it's not fair, it's stupid, it's pathetic. Don't you agree? 
7. People who pretend to care & don't. People like you ruin the world, seriously. You make good people trust others less and less, because they aren't able to tell "fake" personalities from "real" personalities.
8. People who don't like babies. Yes, people like that exist. It's as if they forgot that they once were babies...
9. People who don't respect their parents. The opposite of number 8. It's as if they don't realize that they will one day be parents. 
10. Teachers who don't really care. ...your job is to teach us. Do it right. Have some passion.
11. People who say they're committed when they're really not. You are doing bad for everyone. You aren't helping the group. You aren't helping yourself. 
12. People who lie for absolutely no reason. Seriously? Grow up.
13. People who demean others...based on school, color, race, etc. Once again, GROW UP.
14. People who don't act their age. Stop and look around. Is everyone as silly as you? No...so stop.
15. People who can't speak up. A lot of my friends fall into this category - that doesn't mean they piss me off. It just means that this one part of their personality pisses me off (out of LOVE of course). I want to help them change and have confidence!
16. People who think they're right...when they're wrong.

I could probably think of soooooo many more, but I don't want to write everything. How else will you comment?!

Also, just want to say-I am a very, very happy person despite what this list might make you think! Just wanted to clarify :)

So long <3 

Cure Rayan

"You're the only one who can make a difference."

Rayan is a 3 year old boy who was recently diagnosed with Leukemia. His family is tirelessly looking for a  potential bone marrow donor for him because that is the only way that he will be able to survive. He is one of many that need a bone marrow transplant in order to walk and live on. I actually grew up with someone who was in a wheelchair most of his life. At his high school graduation, he walked for the first time since I had known him (at least 10 years). It was incredible, touching and just simply beautiful.

I helped organize two drives last month with the help of DKMS Americas and both were very successful. Though test results haven't come back, we are hoping that we save a life somewhere! What I wanted to talk to you guys about it...are you registered bone marrow donors? Are your family members and friends registered? What questions do they have that prevents them becoming registered? I want to answer some common questions that people usually have. I want to try to convince you to become registered...let's see if it works!

After saying all of that, I don't want you to think I'm heartless. I do understand why people don't become registered, but I'm still encouraging it. More than that--I totally understand if you cannot become registered. If you yourself have a medical condition, then no one can ever make you feel guilty about it because that's just not fair. If you are underweight (cough cough...) gain some weight!! If you are anemic, start eating green veggies & taking pills! Increase that iron and save a life! Anyway, here are the questions and answers if you're interested.

1. Do I donate my bone marrow the day I register? False: yes. True: NO! What happens the day you register is this: you are given the chance to ask questions if you have any, you then fill out a 1 page application which includes your contact information and such things. Next, you swab your cheek with cotton swabs for DNA tests. That's it. 
2. What happens next? Your swabs are tested to see if you match anyone. This takes 3-6 weeks. There are 10 elements checked for a match with DKMS. With other organizations, they check 6 elements and then do blood work later if you do match someone. Either way, you do not donate unless there is a specific match found.
3. Does the procedure hurt? I am going to put a link here that will help you learn about the procedure. But here's something I want to emphasize: at most, it hurts for a week and it feels like you've been working out too much. Seriously, you can deal with it if you realize that you just saved a life, right?
4. How do I prepare to donate? A nurse will come to YOU wherever you are for 4 days prior to the one-day procedure and give you injections. Yes, needles. I know a lot of you squirm when you hear that, but once again-you are saving a life. Doesn't that make the needles seem like nothing?
5. How long do I have to commit? How long am I on the registry? You are on the national registry until your 61st birthday. You can call to get off of the list whenever you want; it just takes a quick phone call. 
6. Do I have to donate if they call me saying I match someone? The legal answer is no. My answer is yes. Because once a match is found, they start preparing the patient for the procedure. They find out that they will live on, so why would you back out and crush their hopes? Just saying.
7. How long does donating take? It usually takes one day. To be specific, it usually takes 6-8 hours.
8. Will I get to meet my patient? After a year, with the consent of both the donor and the patient, yes you can meet your patient! 

Here is the website that I go for questions: www.dkmsamericas.org. Of course, there are many websites out there and many registries, but just a quick last few facts that I learned before signing off...

The chance for a Caucasian patient to find a match is between 40-80%

The chance for a minority to find a match is approximately 1.7%

Make a change. Increase those numbers. 

I challenge you to convince ten people within the next month to become registered in order to save lives. Trust me, I'll ask you to see if you've done it! Let me know if you are capable and confident enough to accept the challenge! 

**All of my posts won't be so serious, promise! These are just some things I really wanted to talk about. You can always let me know what you'd like me to talk about =] 

$$ Money $$

"Money never made a man happy, nor will it ever. The more a man has, the more he wants. Instead of filling a vacuum, it makes one." 


In 8th grade, we had a substitute teacher who decided to have intellectual conversations with us. He asked us: "is money important?" Everybody answered saying, "yes, of course. How else could we survive?" After thinking about it for awhile, I talked to him on an individual basis and decided that life would be better without money. It was approximately six years ago; therefore, I do not really remember my argument. I do remember that the substitute truly believed I would get far in life, and I would be one of the few that didn't run after money in the future. (I guess my future hasn't yet arrived; therefore, I can't tell you if he's right or wrong.)


Anyway, there are so many times when I wonder why I said that to him at such a young age. And now I feel like I understand my response better. So a group of us students are going to Panama for a week to volunteer and set up business workshops. We need to pay approximately $1500 each to go on this trip. WHY?! We want to volunteer. We want to help.  We want to make a difference. But not everyone can join us because they aren't financially stable. Is that fair?


Why is money so important? Why can't we all just put what we have into society, and hope that it gives back enough to us so that we can live happily? If I could, I would live the rest of my life volunteering with DKMS Americas, going to countries to help the less fortunate, etc. But I can't do that. You know why? I have to think about my future. I have to think about my family and my kids. Instead of focusing my energy on others, I have to be selfish and worry about my financial stability. I know some people are more than happy doing that; they much rather focus on themselves than others. But what about those that just want to change the world? I mean, come on...is it really too much to ask for? I guess so. 


A request from a follower**please add your comments/questions/thoughts through the blog itself instead of FaceBook so that everyone can get involved! 


Before signing off, here's something I'd like to share. Two weeks ago, I e-mailed Rutgers' president asking him what he thought about life. I specifically asked him if he thought I should focus on school or on volunteering and making a difference. His response was very general, but it means a lot that he took out time to respond to a student. I'd like to share a part of his e-mail; it might make things more clear for you:


"You asked whether you should focus on your education or on issues like bone marrow donation—and I think the best answer is to focus on both.  Students who get involved in activities that go beyond the classroom, as long as they are able to balance these activities with their studies, tend to be the most successful students. Again, you have my admiration and my best wishes." 


My cousin wasn't very satisfied with his response, but I like it. 


So long <3

Why Don't You Just Eat Humans?

“There is this deliberate veil, this curtain that’s drawn between us and where our food is coming from. The industry doesn’t want you to know the truth about what you’re eating because if you knew, you might not want to eat it.”

So the person I wrote about earlier (the one that inspired me to start blogging), her name is Nancy. She also inspired me to watch a documentary called "Food Incorporated". I wasn't sure what to expect from it. I guess I just assumed I'd learn about why raw foods are better than meat & dairy products. But instead, I learned more about the food industry in our country. My eyes were opened to the lack of knowledge we have about how our food is made & processed. I was shocked that I had never questioned certain things. What got to me more was the fact that most people still don't care about these issues.

Remember back to your history classes between 8th and 10th grade, where you learned about Upton Sinclair's The Jungle? Do you remember being disgusted back then? I do. It really got to me, because I remember seeing images that were so disturbing. This documentary was so honest about what happens legally when it comes to the food industry.

I guess there's not much I can say. I'm pretty biased since I've been a vegetarian all my life...but I still learned so much that bothered me. A 2 and a half year old boy named Kevin died because of a hamburger that had E-Coli. How did this E-Coli get there? The cows were all fed corn in order to make them fatter faster. This corn that is everywhere and in absolutely everything makes the chances of cows (and other animals) being contaminated by E-Coli to increase. Do you know how important corn is in America? It is used in absolutely everything because it's so cheap...it's in your batteries, it's in diapers, in all of your food. Isn't that weird? I think so.

And the slaughterhouses...have you really seen inside of a slaughterhouse? While watching the video, I imagined humans hanging upside down getting shoved around in order to kill them faster (cows). I imagined shoving humans fighting to live, and instead, getting shoved into tubular shapes to chop off their mouths (chickens). I imagined a machine pushing humans that were screaming and running around into a wall so that they could all die at once, instead of having to take out the effort to kill them individually (hogs). We're killing animals. Animals have feelings. Animals squeal in pain. Animals run away from humans. They feel pain, they fear things. They are so similar to humans. So why don't we just kill humans and eat them if we're so desperate for food?!!

Do I sound ridiculous? Yeah, well I think the meat industry is ridiculous. I think the corn industry is ridiculous. And on top of all of this slaughtering, human rights are taken away in the process. Listen to this. Illegal immigrants that have been working for meat industries for 15-20 years sent back to their country. How is this happening? The meat industry has deals with the immigration people, so that they don't lose production/profit. They are basically selling people to the immigration office on a daily. I understand that these illegal immigrants shouldn't be working in the country, but WHY aren't the people hiring them in the first place arrested?! Why do they just get away with it?!

I guess there's so much more that could be said about this, such as: why are some companies controlling everything? Why are the people leading in the food industry also leading in the regulatory departments? They shouldn't be doing that because they obviously will let everything slide. Why would they want to harm their own profits?! 

I have to go now, but I guess I just wanted to share that since I just finished the documentary. It's worth watching (on NetFlix or wherever you find it). Take our 1.5 hours to see it...it might change your life. Or not. But it's worth a try.

So long <3 

Humanitarianism VS ...?

"Unselfish and noble actions are the most radiant pages in the biography of souls." 


Read the quote again if you only skimmed it the first time. Think about it for a minute. Compare it to something in your life or a friend's life. Isn't that true? (I think it is.) So why is it that "unselfish and noble actions" are never enough? Why is it that people always need and want more? Personally, I think that nothing can even compete against humanitarianism. I mean, look at the title of this post. I don't even know how to label such things. What inspired me for this post? 


I will list no names and no organizations so that this doesn't offend people. And if it does, suck it up and continue reading. So last year, I heard stories from a friend who had gone to another country to volunteer for a week. After coming back, there had been issues about who would lead the organization the year after. The issue wasn't something small; it really affected many people. This angered me-wasn't it enough for all of these people to have gone to another country to just volunteer and help others?! Eventually, I stopped thinking about this. 


This year, I came across a similar situation in which some people weren't satisfied with going to another country. Instead, they wanted to be a part of the executive board, because they wanted this to be a "resume-builder". ARE YOU SERIOUS?! You are going to ANOTHER country to VOLUNTEER and help people. At the same time, you are increasing your knowledge in the business/engineering/medical field. You are able to see peoples' lives change because of you. You are 1 of 12 students out of 40,000+ students at a school. Your money is directly impacting their lives. 


WHY DON'T YOU GET IT?! Isn't that enough for you?! Can't you just be happy that someone else is happy? Re-read the quote up top. Doesn't that mean something to you?


I understand that it's necessary to build your resume so that you can get a great job to be financially stable and to support your family. But isn't there more to life than just that? You are lucky enough to be wherever you are. Think about others. Here's a quote you've probably heard before:
"Today, before you think about saying an unkind word, think of someone who can't speak. 
Before you complain about the taste of your food, think of someone who had no food.
Today, before you complain about your life, think of someone who passed away too early.
Before you complain about your dirty house, think of someone living on the streets.
When you are tired and complain about work, think about someone who is unemployed.
Today, when you complain about walking,  think about someone who has no legs."


So does your resume still seem more important than volunteering and selflessly helping others? What do you think?


My best friend: WHY do we let society dictate who we are? 

Is Shikandy Really "Flamboyant"?

"Definition: florid; ornate; elaborately styled."

This post is dedicated to my best friend. And cherry.

So I was at a discussion on Friday about "bridging the gap" between the Asian American community & the LBGT community. It was an open forum; therefore, people were able to bring up anything and ask anything. The discussion was going really well, since some students had a lot to say. An hour into the discussion, a boy raised his hand and said, "I'm bringing up the R world...religion". Further into the conversation, the facilitator asked Hindus, Muslims, etc. to speak up because no one had said anything.

After one girl spoke her mind, another boy gave his input. First, he talked about the "drag queens" in India. After that, he discussed the Bhavagad Gita. Although this is not strictly a Hindu scripture, many Hindus read it on a daily basis and implement the qualities that are described in it. He then went on to say that one of the characters in the Gita was "overly flamboyant", implying that he was homosexual or something similar.

I was so shocked. I have read through the Gita so many times. I have heard so many stories from the Mahabharat. I thought I knew it all...and now he was stating that there was a homosexual character in it? Please don't think I was upset or anything, I was just shocked that I overlooked such a character! But then he went on to discuss how Indians today rarely mention his characteristics because they don't necessarily approve of such things, especially not in such sacred scriptures. It just proves that they aren't as open to everything as we'd like them to be. But back to Shikhandy...

Let me tell you about his character. In his previous life, Shikhandy was Amba, and she fell in love with Bhishma. He refused to marry her because he had vowed only to follow his duties; therefore, she ended up getting married to someone else in his family. She cursed Bhishma, saying that she would be the cause of his death. Because she was married to someone in his family, she wasn't able to kill Bhishma. She was then re-born as Shikhandy, who fought on the battlefield of Kurukshetra with Arjun and the Pandavas. It is never very clear whether Shikhandy was a male or a female, because his Father raised him as a male even though he was apparently a girl (like I said, unclear). Bhishma (who was still alive because he had a boon that allowed him to choose when he would die) was so intellectual; therefore, he knew that Shikhandy was really Amba when he saw him/her on the field of Kurukshetra. When Shikhandy was standing in front of Bhishma, Bhishma knew that he couldn't raise his weapons against him/her; therefore, he let himself get shot with arrows.

So what is Shikhandy? A male? A female? What characteristics does he have that makes him/her potentially a homosexual? Or even a topic of interest in the LGBT community?

More importantly, what does this say about Indians? It is stated that Shikhandy was carefully placed in the Mahabharat, exactly in the middle of the 18 chapters of the Gita because the author wanted it to be clear that he was "neither here, nor there", meaning that he was neither female nor male. So what was he?

I'm not sure, I'm still looking into it. I'm still shocked that this has always been an issue and I just found out! I know that my best friend will be researching this...she's so pissed about it, hah. Maybe after her exams. :)

So long <3

No One Killed Jessica

"Corruption has its own motivations, and one has to thoroughly study that phenomenon and eliminate the foundations that allow corruption to exist."

Have you seen the movie No One Killed Jessica? I won't give you details just now. I'll give you time to watch it. But it generally had to do with the insane amount of government corruption in India. It opened my  eyes up to the ridiculousness in India. In Gujarat, Narendra Modi is working tirelessly (I think) to improve infrastructure, the education system, businesses, etc. But will the state ever have any credibility if their police force and government officials are so ridiculously corrupt?! They accept money (bribe) from scooterists. They accept money (bribe) from people who break curfews during wedding parties. They beat people up that are of different religions. They commit mass murders just for the hell of it. Why, why why?!

I just don't seem to get it. For that reason, I am in the middle of a 20 page proposal to Narendra Modi in order to change things. (No, I'm not doing it for no reason. It's for my business & professional writing course.) Constant research makes me realize how bad the corruption in India really is. The police officers think that they are justified with their actions because they are not financially stable, but what about the people that are losing money to the cops? What if they're not financially stable? Is it fair that the lower caste is harmed more because of what caste they were born in? Is it fair that cops beat on others because of religious conflicts?

How can India draw a line between the legal institution and everything else? Right now, it's neither straight nor is it very clear. How can we fix it?

I'm thinking about ways to fix it. What are your thoughts? Can you help me help India?

Also, another random fact. It may not be true, but this is what I've heard. For many, many years, there was an area in India where there were always conflicts. One group would always invade into this area and cause harm to the people living there. In 2002, Narendra Modi said "for the next 3 days, you can do whatever you want, I'll turn my head the other way; but after that, you are to not go there again." Because they were given permission, the group spend the next 3 days killing 109/200 people that lived there. But ever since then, they have not stepped foot into this place. The town lost so many people, but now they won't lose anymore. Was it worth it? Does it make sense? Is it logical? I think that it's great that no one goes back there anymore, but was Modi really in a position to just give permission so loosely? I'm not so sure about that.

Your thoughts?

So long <3 

Marriage o.O

"Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open."


There are some people that push off marriage for ever because they love being single. There are some people that push off marriage because they haven't found the right person. There are some people that want to get married, but they haven't found the right person. There are some people that want to get married and have found the right person. Where are you? What is your stance?


Many people think that they are ready to get married, but after a few discussions over the past few weeks, I have a list of things that you should think about before saying that you're truly ready.

1. Scroll up & look at that quote again. Are you willing to meet someone halfway? It's really not that easy to do that. Think about this: you have done things in a certain way for how many years now...18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25...? Longer than that? That's a damn long time to be set in your own ways. And then one day, you have to change your ways. The sink's never empty anymore. The toilet paper rolls up instead of down. The bed is never made. The toothpaste is dried up around the edges. The milk is one row lower than usual. The cake you saved for yourself for tomorrow is not there anymore. Although you have to wake up at 9am, someone's alarm rings at 6am. And then they press the snooze button. You're trying to get work done while someone's watching TV. So much changes! Are you ready to be okay with it all? To just accept it?
2. Are you like my friends and I, in the sense that you sometimes (or more often) just snap at your parents and/or sibling(s)? Are you afraid that you'll snap at your spouse's family? I'm not sure how you feel, but let me be perfectly honest. I don't think that's okay at all. They are your spouse's family after all. You have to respect them more than you respect anyone else. You have to love them like your own family, so that they love you like their own child/sister/brother/etc. I think it's so important that you can control your emotions before you get married. 
3. So now what about getting angry at your spouse? To have an honest and open relationship, you have to show your anger at times. But it's so important that you're able to talk things out. Imagine if you let somethings build up for a long time and then you just explode one day...not only will that be painful, but it will cause harm. Someone will get hurt. 
4. If you find someone that your parents don't approve of, what will you do? I think it's important to think about this beforehand, so that you don't do something you'll regret one day. Imagine if you eloped because you were so in love, ruined your relationship with your family, and then find out a year later that your spouse is cheating on you. Who will be there for you then? Your family. I'm not saying to ditch the person you love, but I'm saying to stop and think it out. Don't let yourself get married until everyone is happy, even if that takes a few years...
5. Are you used to keeping things from people? Remember that an honest relationship will be the best relationship. Being honest doesn't always come naturally...start working on it now.
6. Are you Daddy's little princess? Or Momma's little boy? Then why are you in a rush to get married? Once you're married, you won't ever be able to go back to being this. You will be an adult in a relationship with someone. And if you ARE Daddy's little princess of Momma's little boy after you're married, then I'm almost 100% sure that your spouse isn't happy about it. Ask them.
7. Think about why you're getting married. Is it because you're afraid no one will accept you? That's not the right reason. Is it because someone is rushing you? That's not the right reason. Is it because you're afraid of losing who you have? That's not the right reason. Is it because life is boring and you want something new? That's not the right reason. Is it because you're truly, madly & deeply in love? Bingo, you got it. That's the reason. Go for it & congrats!

I guess that's not really a lot, but if you think about it...these things are sooo incredibly important. If you're not in love and you get married, then you won't be happy. I'm so sure of that. 

My friend asked me what would have happened if these two people that I know (who are so cute and so in love) did not end up getting married after fighting for their love. My response was short, but looking back, I like it so I'll share with you.

"Those beautiful smiles, they wouldn't be so beautiful and big.

Those warm hearts...wouldn't be so warm.

The love, wouldn't really exist and spread.

And their lives? They would have been full of regret."

So don't let that happen to you. 

Get married because you want to get married.

Get married because you love the other person.

So long <3